What is abandonment?

Abandonment is best described as a type of anxiety that some people experience when they lose someone or something they care about. Sometimes, when folk are insecure about things, they may have a fear of being abandoned. 

Unfortunately, everyone has to deal with the end of relationships, and in many cases – even the death of a loved one, during their lifetimes. Loss is a natural part of life, but some people who have psychological abandonment issues, tend to live their lives in fear of such a trauma like that happening. A fear of abandonment is not a recognised mental health condition, it falls under the umbrella of an anxiety condition, and is treated as such.

Some behaviours related to abandonment fears.

Many people living under the bondage of abandonment fears, seem to exhibit similar behavioural patterns. Here are some of the common behaviours.

·      Engaging in several shallow relationships, so that if things don’t look good, they are able to leave the relationship before the other person can, and so avoid being abandoned.

·      Some folk are so afraid of being abandoned that they may sabotage good relationships so that they are not hurt should a partner leave.

·      Needing constant emotional reassurance is a major behavioural sign that you have abandonment issues.   

·      There are people who cling to unhealthy relationships which may be abusive, despite a desire to leave. The fear of being alone is infinitely more powerful than that of putting up with a poor relationship.

·      Trust issues and strong feelings of insecurity even in a good relationship, are always in the forefront of your mind.

Any of these behaviours can result in unhealthy emotional consequences, and over time can damage relationships. It may also be difficult for people to form normal bonds with other folk.

Risk factors for abandonment.

A history of the following circumstances may increase the risk for developing a fear of abandonment.

·      Neglect.People who are more likely to develop this issue include those who have been neglected, abused, and deserted, especially during childhood.

·      Stress.High levels of stress lead to high levels of anxiety. This can make you more vulnerable to unreasonable fears and cause new anxieties to occur.

·      Trauma.Unresolved traumatic events such as a serious injury, a robbery, or a sudden death of someone close to you, which left you bereft and abandoned.

Add to this a chronic fear of being alone, and you have the perfect environment for a fear of abandonment to run riot in your mind.  

Treating abandonment issues.

To successfully treat these issues, you need to get a new mindset which is free of baggage and irrational fears.  Studies have shown that the best way to do this is by means of hypnotherapy. A professional therapist can use hypnosis to access the subconscious mind and help you to find the actual root cause from which the fears originate. You will also learn how to react when you sense the fears rising in your mind. Abandonment often stems from childhood loss. This may have been as a result of trauma, such as the loss of a parent through divorce, or death.

Fear of abandonment may also be due to a collapse of a romantic, or even a friendship, relationship which has left you bereft, lost, and feeling alone. This could have happened at any time in your life, and remains buried in your subconscious. Counselling and hypnosis by an experienced therapist can access your subconscious mind, and help you to unload the fears and the baggage which may have been there for some time.

Long term effects of abandonment issues.

Untreated, these fears can increase general anxiety problems, and may alienate potential friends, and romantic partners.

Hypnosis can assist you to overcome any abandonment problems, give you confidence, and restore your self-esteem.