What about forgiveness?

Forgiveness is best described as a decision to let go of feelings of anger, resentment and disappointment toward someone you believe has wronged you. However, somewhere in your mind, there may be feelings of guilt because you have a belief that you might have done something to deserve such hurt. This is especially true if you have been rejected and heartbroken by the collapse of an important, long-term relationship.

Research has shown that if you have compassion for yourself, as well as the ability to forgive yourself for perceived, or real, wrong-doings, it will help to reduce anxiety and stress caused by a broken heart.

About self-forgiveness.

Forgiving yourself is more than just putting the past behind you and moving on. Studies have indicated that facing and accepting what has happened to you, or what you have done, perception or not, it is the first step to forgiveness on both levels. By taking responsibility that you have hurt others, who have hurt you, you can avoid negative emotions like excessive regret and guilty feelings. 

Remember that you do not have to wait for someone to forgive you before you can make the effort to forgive yourself. You can decide whether you want to stay bound in guilt, or move forward with confidence. If your heart has been broken and you are still reeling from the pain, begin the process of putting forgiveness into practice, which can help you reduce the issues of stress and anxiety you may be experiencing.

Repairing the damage.

Making amends is an important part of forgiveness, even if the person you most want to forgive is yourself. Apologise, if it is needed, and look for other considerate ways you can make up for your mistakes. If you are the offended one, it may seem that you are not getting any benefit from this process, but there may have other things that you regret and feel sorry for.

If you fall into a trap of brooding about your errors, it can be damaging, and make it difficult to maintain your motivation to carry on. Mistakes in a relationship may be painful, but if you are able to forgive yourself for your part in the strife, it is one of the ways to help you start to move on with your life.

Moving on.

Experts agree that the most effective way to do this is by means of hypnotherapy which can access the subconscious mind, and establish which issues are responsible for guilt feelings that hold you back. Once you get to the root causes which prevent you from forgiving yourself, a healing process can begin to take place.

Here are some of the ways therapy can help you deal with pain, grief, and heartbreak:

·        You will learn how to focus on your emotions, accept that you have made a mistake, and are prepared to let it go and move on.

·        Therapy will help you to change the thought patterns that may cause you to constantly criticise yourself, and take the blame for something which may not have been your fault.

·        You will also learn how to approach anxious situations differently, and overcome fears by correcting irrational thoughts and negative behaviours.

The therapist can help you to create a new mindset, free of baggage and negativity, and allow you to move forward with restored confidence and self-esteem.